You may have heard by now that neuroscientists have been discovering exciting new information about the heart that shows it is way more complex than we'd ever imagined. Yep... "neurocardiology" is an actual field! The “heart-brain” concept was introduced by Dr. J. Andrew Amour in the early 1990s, and out of his work has come some amazing, cutting edge research and data.
Scientists have found that, as opposed to simply pumping blood through your body, the heart actually directs and helps balance other systems in the body so that they can function harmoniously. The heart actually has its own nervous system built in, which is how it has come to be referred to as the "heart brain". Studies show at least 40,000 neurons in the heart, which is roughly how many are found in various subcortical centers of the brain.
As strange as it may sound, it seems that the heart can actually learn and remember information, and even has the ability to respond intuitively--before our brain does. Heart "coherence" (the heart's rhythm varying steadily over a 10 second cycle) has been linked to function in other systems, including the immune system.
So, a healthy, coherent heart-brain connection can help us be more emotionally healthy, but also leads to balanced thinking and increased physical health. The HeartMath Institute in Boulder, Colorado is on the front lines of this research. They are one organization who have come up with easy and innovative ways to harness your heart's inherent intelligence to live a more balanced life. What they describe are basically evidence-based mindfulness practices that look a lot like scientific sounding meditation practices. If you have ever wondered whether meditation is actually useful for anything other than spiritual enlightenment...well, here you go!
I don't think it matters what you call it, or what psychological perspective you come from. Just sit still, focus your breath in your heart area, and visualize a peaceful memory you have...or imagine breathing loving energy out to someone or something you love...and it is guaranteed to eventually calm you down. HeartMath suggests inbreaths and outbreaths of 5 seconds, while you imagine your breath going in and out through your heart. This can be really helpful.
The main thing about this is that the science shows the longer you're able to keep yourself in that calm state, the more coherent your heart and brain are able to stay in the long term. It means practicing "coherence" (or, in other words, meditation) actually trains your heart-brain (and brain brain) to change from less functionl habits of stress and reactivity to resilient, functional habits of calm and balance. It means that we are able to physically change our own brain structure, and thereby, our ways of thinking and feeling...all by ourselves! How cool is that? I realize that someday this knowledge could put me and other counseling professionals out of business... but really, it's amazing how we can heal ourselves if we want to, and I'm willing to put myself out of business in the interest of healthier communities made by balanced people.
Showing posts with label conscious. Show all posts
Showing posts with label conscious. Show all posts
Monday, October 10, 2011
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Compassion and Clear Seeing
The first teaching in my counseling training that began the snowball of internal change for me is from my meditation class. My instructor had such a graceful, gentle presence, but also a forcefulness about her. She has a way of speaking softly, yet so precisely, that it cut right through my defenses, and something inside me perked up to receive her message.
That is how, six years ago, I got serious about mindfulness, began exploring spiritually, and set about healing myself so that I could more effectively help my clients. For seven years before that point, I had moved between various social service jobs that burned me out emotionally and drained me of my (then pretty unconscious) healing and positive energies.
I was "helping people" in college and through my twenties, to be sure. I allowed my ego the pleasures of self-righteousness and pride on a daily basis, and built most of my life around social service and political activism. I was a fiery revolutionary. The substance use, anxiety attacks, and emotional dysregulation that I also lived with, however, did not help me to meet the lofty dreams I had for myself.
That teacher who so skillfully helped me open up to a new world of thought and feeling ended up being my clinical supervisor for my internship, and I will be forever grateful for her guidance--but more importantly for her compassion and clear seeing--which, as she described during that meditation class, were "like two wings of a bird". On the one side, we must have gentleness and sympathy for other beings. But we must balance ourselves with mindfulness--unconditional attentive presence to our true experience, so that we can see reality. Balancing these qualities allows us to act skillfully on our own behalf as well as for others.
This idea of balancing compassion and clear seeing has become the foundation of my worldview as well as the core of my professional theoretical orientation. It's encouraging to me that "mindfulness" has increasingly become a buzzword in our culture and in the counseling profession. I would love to see authentic mindfulness practices gain popular momentum, because I know what power and transformation flow from them. Research seems to be showing that cognitive and mindfulness practices are as effective as drugs for coping with various psychological disorders and imbalanced emotional states.
In most developmental models of psychology and spirituality, each stage transcends the former, while necessarily including and building upon it. To me, this sounds like dialectics, which my previous political philosophies were founded on. Which sort of resolves for me the confusion as to how my spiritual and sociopolitical perspectives could be synthesized. So there you have it.
I started this blog in a way that felt random a few days ago... but now, seeing more clearly, I realize that at my core is a very clear intention--to participate in and help generate a movement rooted in dialectical engaged mindfulness (yep, pretty sure I just made that up!) In other words, I'm into a revolution of the heart and mind that leads to skillful collective action toward building healthier communities and institutions. So, the existential crisis and cognitive dissonance I talked about in my first blog? Maybe with all this "mindfulness" talk floating about, we're on our way to the next stage.
That is how, six years ago, I got serious about mindfulness, began exploring spiritually, and set about healing myself so that I could more effectively help my clients. For seven years before that point, I had moved between various social service jobs that burned me out emotionally and drained me of my (then pretty unconscious) healing and positive energies.
I was "helping people" in college and through my twenties, to be sure. I allowed my ego the pleasures of self-righteousness and pride on a daily basis, and built most of my life around social service and political activism. I was a fiery revolutionary. The substance use, anxiety attacks, and emotional dysregulation that I also lived with, however, did not help me to meet the lofty dreams I had for myself.
That teacher who so skillfully helped me open up to a new world of thought and feeling ended up being my clinical supervisor for my internship, and I will be forever grateful for her guidance--but more importantly for her compassion and clear seeing--which, as she described during that meditation class, were "like two wings of a bird". On the one side, we must have gentleness and sympathy for other beings. But we must balance ourselves with mindfulness--unconditional attentive presence to our true experience, so that we can see reality. Balancing these qualities allows us to act skillfully on our own behalf as well as for others.
This idea of balancing compassion and clear seeing has become the foundation of my worldview as well as the core of my professional theoretical orientation. It's encouraging to me that "mindfulness" has increasingly become a buzzword in our culture and in the counseling profession. I would love to see authentic mindfulness practices gain popular momentum, because I know what power and transformation flow from them. Research seems to be showing that cognitive and mindfulness practices are as effective as drugs for coping with various psychological disorders and imbalanced emotional states.
In most developmental models of psychology and spirituality, each stage transcends the former, while necessarily including and building upon it. To me, this sounds like dialectics, which my previous political philosophies were founded on. Which sort of resolves for me the confusion as to how my spiritual and sociopolitical perspectives could be synthesized. So there you have it.
I started this blog in a way that felt random a few days ago... but now, seeing more clearly, I realize that at my core is a very clear intention--to participate in and help generate a movement rooted in dialectical engaged mindfulness (yep, pretty sure I just made that up!) In other words, I'm into a revolution of the heart and mind that leads to skillful collective action toward building healthier communities and institutions. So, the existential crisis and cognitive dissonance I talked about in my first blog? Maybe with all this "mindfulness" talk floating about, we're on our way to the next stage.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Thoughts on existential crisis...
Existential crisis, you say?
At some point in life, as our mortality becomes real to us, we might question whether life has any meaning or purpose. Many of us feel scared of this possible lack of meaning in a universe that makes us feel so small. We get to feeling like our little personal lives are so important, with all our interpersonal conflicts, likes and dislikes, daily responsibilities...and then once in a while we have to wonder...is it even worth the effort? What's the point? Why should I try to do or be better when we all just die anyway?
This thinking can strike us at any time in life. It can feel random, but it is likely to come during important developmental growth spurts. It can also be sparked by such life transitions as births, deaths, marriage, midlife crisis, divorce, or loss of employment. It can also come when a life-threatening experience happens to us or to a loved one.
Some people tend to avoid considering their mortality. Some aren't really bothered when they have such thoughts, and some have initial anxiety but come to accept their mortality with little worry. Some people can look at their life and feel a sense of pride, comfort, or self-actualization (they've done enough things they feel are meaningful). But for some folks, it can be overwhelming, and they can become plagued by anxiety, fear, and feelings of depression.
Psychology buffs will recognize that this type of anxiety, panic, or crisis is one result of cognitive dissonance--originally defined as the feelings of discomfort caused by having two seemingly conflicting ideas at the same time. This theory says we tend to change our beliefs, actions, and attitudes to reduce our internal conflict.
As we grow up, our brains cause us to question the world around us, and seek understandings that make sense and feel safe. We act how we think we "should" based on our knowledge and experience. As we age and mature, it often becomes clear how much we don't know, and how much in this big world makes no rational sense. Many people feel uncomfortable with or scared by paradoxes or the unknown, and they behave in various ways to avoid that discomfort. All kinds of irrational beliefs about ourselves and the world spring up from that fear--from trying to survive a life of unknowns.
When we feel fear or discomfort of any kind, we tend to look for ways to feel better--and sometimes we think and behave in unhealthy or imbalanced ways because our fear triggers our defense mechanisms. We're human, and wired for survival, after all. Our brains have the blessing (and the curse) of being able to quickly find ways out of situations that feel scary or threatening.
Some of us emotionally shut down or become avoidant. We can become overly absorbed in work, exercise, family, television and electronic media, and some resort to substance use, comfort eating, and other addictions...anything to temporarily relieve our mental and emotional pressure. Other folks become aggressive or passive/aggressive, grasping for a sense of control. We might try to make ourselves feel better by blaming others, or by justifying our own negative behavior--projecting our suffering and anger onto our "enemies", or onto bad situations that we see as out of our own control. By doing so, we avoid having to take responsibility for our feelings. It's so easy to avoid our own discomfort by focusing on everyone and everything else but ourselves!
Here's a thought. Next time you find yourself annoyed by someone who seems to be acting like a jerk (for instance, road raging or yelling at a stranger for bumping into them), instead of letting it upset you, you could try an experiment: Get curious. Ask yourself "What is this person afraid of right now?". It takes a little guts and a little self control to stop and do this. But in doing so, you might find a little space to notice that "that jerk" is only using their defense mechanisms--they're doing the only thing their brain knows to do in that moment to survive. They are probably caught up in their own dramas or crises and not coping very well. Bringing awareness to this may remind you that we ALL behave badly sometimes, and that by letting someone else's behavior or negative energy upset us, we're only spinning our own wheel of suffering...so we may as well not sweat it.
According to good ol' WikiPedia, an existential crisis may arise in the first place for a number of reasons, including but not limited to:
The sense of being alone and isolated in the world
A new-found grasp or appreciation of one's mortality
Believing that one's life has no purpose or external meaning
Awareness of one's freedom and the consequences of accepting or rejecting that freedom
An extremely pleasurable or hurtful experience that leaves one seeking meaning
So maybe, if we can realize that we're all in the same boat, and that (either consciously or unconsciously) we're all just doing what our brains have learned to do to make it through this world, we can choose to give ourselves and each other a break. It's quite possible that your partner, family member,friend, neighbor, boss, or that jerky stranger--is dealing with their own stuff, just like you probably are or have at some point, and probably will again.
Forgiveness and compassion are two of the most important coping skills (and arguably the two most important traits in healthy communities). Practicing these two behaviors will help you deal with YOUR stuff, while helping you cope with other people (especially difficult ones) and THEIR stuff. Now, I'm not condoning anyone's abusive behavior or implying that anyone should be a doormat...I'm just saying that forgiveness and compassion for ourselves and others leaves room for growth and hope for change. We obviously should not stay in any situation that is ACTUALLY threatening!
As far as how to cope with existential crisis itself? That's up to you. Existentialism says you get to define your own life's meaning, and that you must choose to resolve "the crisis of existence". If that helps you get to where you'd like to be, great. Or, consider learning how to feel more balanced in yourself, learning to be more emotionally present with the people you care about, and choosing to do your part (whatever that is) to lessen the suffering of yourself and other beings in the world. From this moment, you get to define your own meaning and purpose, and choose how you want to react, feel, and behave in the world. And guess what? Starting where you are right now in this moment, today, is good enough.
At some point in life, as our mortality becomes real to us, we might question whether life has any meaning or purpose. Many of us feel scared of this possible lack of meaning in a universe that makes us feel so small. We get to feeling like our little personal lives are so important, with all our interpersonal conflicts, likes and dislikes, daily responsibilities...and then once in a while we have to wonder...is it even worth the effort? What's the point? Why should I try to do or be better when we all just die anyway?
This thinking can strike us at any time in life. It can feel random, but it is likely to come during important developmental growth spurts. It can also be sparked by such life transitions as births, deaths, marriage, midlife crisis, divorce, or loss of employment. It can also come when a life-threatening experience happens to us or to a loved one.
Some people tend to avoid considering their mortality. Some aren't really bothered when they have such thoughts, and some have initial anxiety but come to accept their mortality with little worry. Some people can look at their life and feel a sense of pride, comfort, or self-actualization (they've done enough things they feel are meaningful). But for some folks, it can be overwhelming, and they can become plagued by anxiety, fear, and feelings of depression.
Psychology buffs will recognize that this type of anxiety, panic, or crisis is one result of cognitive dissonance--originally defined as the feelings of discomfort caused by having two seemingly conflicting ideas at the same time. This theory says we tend to change our beliefs, actions, and attitudes to reduce our internal conflict.
As we grow up, our brains cause us to question the world around us, and seek understandings that make sense and feel safe. We act how we think we "should" based on our knowledge and experience. As we age and mature, it often becomes clear how much we don't know, and how much in this big world makes no rational sense. Many people feel uncomfortable with or scared by paradoxes or the unknown, and they behave in various ways to avoid that discomfort. All kinds of irrational beliefs about ourselves and the world spring up from that fear--from trying to survive a life of unknowns.
When we feel fear or discomfort of any kind, we tend to look for ways to feel better--and sometimes we think and behave in unhealthy or imbalanced ways because our fear triggers our defense mechanisms. We're human, and wired for survival, after all. Our brains have the blessing (and the curse) of being able to quickly find ways out of situations that feel scary or threatening.
Some of us emotionally shut down or become avoidant. We can become overly absorbed in work, exercise, family, television and electronic media, and some resort to substance use, comfort eating, and other addictions...anything to temporarily relieve our mental and emotional pressure. Other folks become aggressive or passive/aggressive, grasping for a sense of control. We might try to make ourselves feel better by blaming others, or by justifying our own negative behavior--projecting our suffering and anger onto our "enemies", or onto bad situations that we see as out of our own control. By doing so, we avoid having to take responsibility for our feelings. It's so easy to avoid our own discomfort by focusing on everyone and everything else but ourselves!
Here's a thought. Next time you find yourself annoyed by someone who seems to be acting like a jerk (for instance, road raging or yelling at a stranger for bumping into them), instead of letting it upset you, you could try an experiment: Get curious. Ask yourself "What is this person afraid of right now?". It takes a little guts and a little self control to stop and do this. But in doing so, you might find a little space to notice that "that jerk" is only using their defense mechanisms--they're doing the only thing their brain knows to do in that moment to survive. They are probably caught up in their own dramas or crises and not coping very well. Bringing awareness to this may remind you that we ALL behave badly sometimes, and that by letting someone else's behavior or negative energy upset us, we're only spinning our own wheel of suffering...so we may as well not sweat it.
According to good ol' WikiPedia, an existential crisis may arise in the first place for a number of reasons, including but not limited to:
So maybe, if we can realize that we're all in the same boat, and that (either consciously or unconsciously) we're all just doing what our brains have learned to do to make it through this world, we can choose to give ourselves and each other a break. It's quite possible that your partner, family member,friend, neighbor, boss, or that jerky stranger--is dealing with their own stuff, just like you probably are or have at some point, and probably will again.
Forgiveness and compassion are two of the most important coping skills (and arguably the two most important traits in healthy communities). Practicing these two behaviors will help you deal with YOUR stuff, while helping you cope with other people (especially difficult ones) and THEIR stuff. Now, I'm not condoning anyone's abusive behavior or implying that anyone should be a doormat...I'm just saying that forgiveness and compassion for ourselves and others leaves room for growth and hope for change. We obviously should not stay in any situation that is ACTUALLY threatening!
As far as how to cope with existential crisis itself? That's up to you. Existentialism says you get to define your own life's meaning, and that you must choose to resolve "the crisis of existence". If that helps you get to where you'd like to be, great. Or, consider learning how to feel more balanced in yourself, learning to be more emotionally present with the people you care about, and choosing to do your part (whatever that is) to lessen the suffering of yourself and other beings in the world. From this moment, you get to define your own meaning and purpose, and choose how you want to react, feel, and behave in the world. And guess what? Starting where you are right now in this moment, today, is good enough.
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